Breathe

I am probably THE WORST blogger there is, and have completely fallen behind on my "blogging duties", however, the past 3 years have not been good to our families. We have been on a wild roller coaster ride called "life" and it seems to just as simply put it: SUCK.

But, today I come to all you blogger peeps out there to ask for Prayer, prayer for a 16 month old little girl who is very ill. Prayer to give the doctors wisdom and guidance to help this baby girl, prayer for a mommy who has had a rough couple of years and especially 6 months, who needs strength to get through the day, who needs wisdom and guidance to make the best decision for her sweet baby girl, who just needs to feel comforted in this time of need. I pray that Our God, the almighty healer, would wrap his arms around her and her baby girl so tightly and just love on them both. Let them know that they are not alone, that HE is here and HE will protect them and watch over them and heal them from their hurt, pain and suffering.

I am left with a song by MercyMe that I feel verbalizes our feelings so perfectly:

                                                                           Why?

 The question that is never far away

 The healing doesn’t come from the explained

 Jesus please don’t let this go in vain 

 You’re all I have All that remains 

 So here I am What’s left of me

 Where glory meets my suffering 

 I’m alive 

 Even though a part of me has died 

 You take my heart and breathe it back to life

 I’ve fallen into Your arms open wide

 When the hurt and the healer collide

 Breathe Sometimes I feel it’s all that I can do

 Pain so deep that I can hardly move

 Just keep my eyes completely fixed on You

 Lord take hold and pull me through 

 People tell you that all you have to do is breathe, when all else seems so dark and faded, when your whole world seems to have fallen apart, you are asked to breathe. The hardest part about breathing is how much it hurts to breathe, you feel like your chest is caving in and this intense pain takes over you so fast. I wake up throughout the night with such a heavy burden and pain throughout my chest and body and tell myself "just breathe" yet its my memories that I can't escape, its my memories that cause this pain, because in that moment you realize it's not a dream, that this is in fact your reality and your your reality is your nightmare.

 I try and remind myself of all the things in life I should be grateful for, that we still have so much joy and happiness left, and I try to be strong, I try to be optimistic, I try to be happy and put on a smiling face. I know that life could be much worse, and I am grateful for all the wonderful things I do have. Right now we are on a rocky road and we are swimming to catch our breathe so we don't drown, but I know that I trust and believe in the one true God and I have faith that HE will pull us all out of this darkness and we will see that light at the end of the tunnel. I put my faith and trust in HIM. 

 Thank you for the prayers.

 xoxo Lauren